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MY LIVING WILL





Last night my sister and I were sitting in the den and I said to her, 'I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle to keep me alive. That would be no quality of life at all, if that ever happens, just pull the plug.


So she got up, unplugged the computer, and threw out my wine. She's such a bitch:mad:
 

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When I die, I want to go quietly in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming in the night like the passengers in his car.
 

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But why did she pour out your wine? That's just mean!!!!
 

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One of the great mysteries of the universe!
 

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I don't understand what you guys are talking about. I have got women down to a science. As long as you put the seat back up your fine. RIGHT? Or was that put the seat back down. OH **** GUYS! looks like I'm on the couch again. I will remember that one day.:eek:
 

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Getting the seat right only works until they expect you to do it...then you have to come up with a new thing to stay out of hot water...vicious cycle!!!
 

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9 WORDS WOMEN USE
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>
>
> (1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they
> are right and you need to shut up.
>
>
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> (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dresse d, this means a half an
> hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given
> five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
>
>
>
> (3) Nothing This is the calm before the storm. This means
> something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with
> nothing usually end in fine.
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>
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> (4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission Don't Do It!
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>
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> (5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal
> statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks
> you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing
> here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for
> the meaning of nothing.)
>
>
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> (6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a
> woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long
> and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
>
>
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> (7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just
> say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true,
> unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not
> thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' ... that will
> bring on a 'whatever').
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> (8) Whatever: Is a women's way of saying ____ YOU!
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> (9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement,
> meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several
> times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man
> asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3:huh:
 
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