im sure some of you guys get those pop ups on websites asking if you need help on their site. well i decided to have a little fun with one.
Welcome to XXXXXcompany nameXXXXXX. A representative will be with you shortly.
Hello my name is Taryn. To help us serve you better, please provide your name and the name of your company.
Taryn: Hello there
Taryn: How can I help you today?
You: nothing...what are you doing. working i bet....so am i....
Taryn: Great. Are you currently researching business solutions for possible use within your company?
Taryn: I see. What type of solution are you looking for?
You: well i need to know how to keep track of bowls of cereral
You: track milk
You: boxes of cereal
You: bowls spoons
You: like a fast food but mroe customized
You: so like u can have bannanas in your froested flake
Taryn: All right. What are you currently using to track these processes?
You: or cheezze
You: i love bannaa
Taryn: I see. Is this a startup company?
Taryn: Got it. When will your company be opening?
You: it sup and running
You: but its not working out well because of the issues
You: very new
Taryn: I see. What types of issues are you having?
You: im currently runnng the busnis out of my car....kind alike a icecream truck
You: but i caryy a small folding table with chairs and stuff
You: an umbrelle to block the sun on hot days
Taryn: Okay. The best way to learn about the different solutions XXXXXcompany nameXXXXXX offers is from a XXXXXcompany nameXXXXXX Partner. Are you currently working with a local Partner?
You: no i think they are crooks
Taryn: I see. The Partners are the experts on the solutions and will be the ones you would want to speak with. My role actually lies in connecting prospective customers with XXXXXcompany nameXXXXXX Partners for their software needs, so my specific knowledge of the solutions is a bit limited.
Taryn: I can get you in touch with a Partner to assist you with your research of XXXXXcompany nameXXXXXX's solution options.
Taryn: Let's start with your contact information. (Name, company name, phone number, e-mail address)
You: wouldnt XXXXXcompany nameXXXXXX be the real experts? not some nerd over charging me so he can play halk life and loard of th ering son his supped up machine....
You: i love cereal
You: god i wish i could have a bowl right now
You: My name is XXXXX
Taryn: I see. XXXXXcompany nameXXXXXX certifies its Partners to be the experts in the solutions. Your next step would be to meet with a Partner. Is this something I can do for you today?
You: is taryn your real name or jus tyour screen name?
You: does XXXXXcompany nameXXXXXX have a myspace page?
Taryn: It's my real name
Taryn: No, I am not aware of one. Can I get you in touch with a Partner to assist you moving forward, Phillip?
You: corparations on moveing to promote on myspace
You: what ever you can do to help my my freind
Taryn: Okay. To get you in touch with a Partner, may I have your full name, company name, phone number, and e-mail address?
You: i fyour ever in town just look for me ill be selling bowls of milk and cereal out my car
You: Phillip XXXX
You: Bowls for the road
You: do u need a cell or a land line?
Taryn: Either would work.
You: where are you from?
Taryn: I am located in Fargo, ND. What is your e-mail address?
You: do you what the email address taht i use for spamers?
You: are you going to spam me?
You: or send me phishing emails?
You: i hate that stuff
You: i always get more when i giv eit out
Taryn: No, this e-mail address would be used by the Partner so they can contact you. So you would want to give your primary e-mail address so they can get a hold of you.
You: what syour favorate cereal?
You: i gouelss i would have to huh
You: sorry for the bad spelling
You: my fingers are quite pudggy
Taryn: No problem. What is your e-mail address, Phillip?
You: [email protected]
You: i trust you
You: dont burn me
You: so whats your fav frosted flakes?
You: fruity pepbles?
You: cpatin crunch i bet
You: i love the captin
Taryn: Thanks. What is the physical address of your company, including city, state, and zip code? A headquarters location will work.
You: but it gives me firery runs th enext day
Taryn: I do need this information in order to get you in touch with a Partner. May I have the physical address of your company in order to get you in touch with a Partner in your are?
You: XXXX ADDY HEREXXXXX
You: why so shy about the cereal
Taryn: Thanks. How many employees do you have within your company?
You: u do like cereal dont u
You: you not a comunist are you?
You: right now myself....but i might have to lay him off soon if this dones twork out soon
What is the budget or range you are working with for this project?
You: would you like to see my comapny website since im on yours? kinda like show me mine sho wme yours?
You: budget range
You: well i do have great credit
You: i got a good score
You: gues what score i got
You: u wont beliv eit
Taryn: I can give you a ballpark range for our solutions today.
You: your not very personalbe ar eyou
You: thats ok
You: just copme on to bowls for the road and well set u up nicey nice
Taryn: We estimate that the XXXX ERP solutions can ballpark anywhere from $2,000-$6,000 per concurrent user. This is the one-time cost of the software alone. Additional costs may include customization, implementation, services and support.
Taryn: Is this within a range your company would be comfortable with?
You: do you gues take cash?
Taryn: Pricing and payment information will come from the Partner. I do need some more information about your company in order to pair you with a Partner. Do you have a few minutes now, or would you prefer that I e-mail you the remaining questions, or have someone call for this?
You: would you be the one calling?
Taryn: No, I do our online chats. We have a phone team that someone would be calling from.
You: well since we have already estabished a somewhat good relationship id like to stay with you
You: you hav ebeen soo sweet and caring
You: but u have to tell my your fav cereal
Taryn: Okay, we can proceed. When are you looking to have a new solution implemented?
You: is it me is mt my fat pudggy finngers you dont like?
Taryn: If you'd prefer, I can call you to discuss this further.
You: as long as its you
Taryn: All right. I will give you a call in the next 5-10 minutes.
You: thank you i look forard to it
Taryn: You're welcome. Thanks for chatting today, XXXX
Chat session has been ended by the representative.